Fifteen Years

On Sunday, I celebrated fifteen years since I married Dave! It was my tenth anniversary without him here, but this anniversary felt fairly lightweight. Marrying Dave was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, and I am grateful for the time we had together.

Lydia reminds me of Dave daily; she’s a treasure like her dad. This weekend, we made a bit of forward progress… another project requiring more tools.

Fifteen years ago, Dave and I bought a closet organizer that had several pieces. We used it in our old house in Illinois but separated it into different rooms when we moved to North Dakota.


Over the last year or so, Lydia’s been requesting we remove the drawers and shelves that ended up in her room. The drawers have needed repairs on and off for ten years. I suppose fifteen years is a long time for particle board! Nonetheless, I kept putting it off.

Because of its size, it seemed like a lot of effort, mentally and physically. I knew I would have to do it all myself! But it was also emotionally tough because whenever I saw it, I could envision Dave installing it with great love and attention to detail. Oh, how he loved Lydia and wanted the best for her!

Well, thanks to our recent break from work and school, I finally felt relaxed and ready to tackle it. Lydia cleaned it out and cleared space. Then, I unscrewed it from the wall. We removed the drawers and shelves before I slowly pulled the unit down to the floor.

I’m pretty sure that the unit was just waiting to come down! Almost with a sigh of relief, it fell into two sections before hitting the floor! I could see what was happening, so I was prepared. Ironically, it saved me the effort of prying it loose! Then, the hinges on the door gave way, and the rest just came apart.

Finally, I carried it to the curb for garbage pickup on Monday. Lydia promptly moved her desk into that new space. It fits perfectly. In fact, the desk looks much better there than sticking out from the window, its previous location.



In hindsight, it was almost as if the wardrobe was just holding together until I could finally release it. It felt like an object lesson, a statement: It’s okay to hold onto the past for a little while, but it’s also good to let it go. That’s part of healing and moving forward.

I don’t know if you need to let something go… but maybe it’s time. It’s not that it means less now, but consider how you have grown past the point of needing it. Or, perhaps it is keeping you from growth.

Then again, maybe there’s nothing holding you back… But are you holding something else back? No rush. No pressure. Just something to consider. As Lysa TerKeurst says, “Emotions are indicators, not dictators.” God wants us to live a full life. But life is short, and we don’t have time to waste. 

Ultimately, we want to listen to Jesus and follow His timing in our lives. We don’t have to be afraid; He is trustworthy. He will make it clear when we need to keep moving forward!

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God, thanks for blessing me, protecting me, and providing for me. Thanks for the reminder to let go of things that aren’t good for me anymore so I can follow You more closely. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What is God asking you to do as a result of this blog post? Is there something holding you back from following Him?

Tasks: Take a little inventory of your environment, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Be brave and let go of what is not serving you well. Trust Jesus and keep moving forward!

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